Here in The Sewers, we oppose strongly to the concept of being blank and bored inside our heads, and yet, leading extraordinarily boring lives such as yourselves, we did get bored during our childhood, adolescence and adult life; we do get bored, sometimes on a daily basis; and we will get bored until the day we die. At times of such boredom, we have grown accustomed to a bizarre habit: staring at the people who bore us while they do, and imagining who they would be if they were the absolute radicalization of themselves. This intellectual and private mind game has become our way of life.

As we grew more experienced and bold in our mind game, we began trying to bring realization to these radicalizations of mundane persons. We began to inveigle those Alter-Personas out of everyone we were talking to. This led, of course, to some socially inadequate behavior, in the form of somewhat invasive questions, and weird, unrelated comments. But it also led us to believe we were right all along: extravagant Alter-ego Personas do exist, even in the most boring of persons.

Once this alter-world had revealed itself to us, we could not let it rest in the backstage of our social interactions. This inveiglement of Alter-Personas has become our alter-mission.

During the course of this inner and alter investigation within ourselves and others, we have discovered and affirmed the obvious: Alter-ego Personas must not always be radicalizations of their persons. Many Alter-Personas are completely separate and independent of their person, and some are in total opposition to it. All, of course, are welcome.

The main Alter-ego Persona here in The Sewers is the Ultra-Viewer Persona (the U.P), a Persona well skilled in the mind game of luring Personas out of their persons. The U.P conducts many of the Alterviews – that is, interviews of Alter-ego Personas – here in The Sewers, and is the primary Alterviewer of new-comers, such as your(alter)selves.

All Alterviews conducted in The Sewers are strictly subjected to the Protocol. Alter-Personas who have made The Sewers their home also engage in Altersations from time to time – that is, informal conversations between two or more Alter-Personas. Altersations are looser and may be more playful regarding the Protocol, but aren’t usually made public and therefore are quite rare. We find the alterviewing concept to be most facilitating and appropriate for our alter-mission.

We thank you and congratulate you here and now for joining us here in The Sewers. Make the whole lot of yourselves comfortable!